By a whisker.......

Whadda you think of when you hear "whisker"?

I think of........... cats.   Santa.   ZZ Top.   That first stroll in the morning to pee, a glance in the mirror after shaving the day before.. "Damnit, they're back."  Unkept mebbe.  Just shoot me, sometimes I guess I think of homeless.   A close race, "won by a whisker."

Would you call the hair on a lady's legs whiskers?

If ya do, would you believe women spend more time shaving than men?  Uh huh, one source, "Women spend 72 days shaving their legs over the course of a lifetime.. approximately 1,728 hours.. Men spend 45 days shaving their beard and neck, or, 1,080 hours over their lifetime."

OK, in fairness, those stats, which didn't/don't even include armpits, bikini, or, say, a man's back (eww).. the stats are from a company in Nova Scotia espousing laser hair removal.

"Time to get out the hedge trimmers.  Yeah, I haven't shaved my legs since November."  Maxine

Hate, of course, is a strong word.  That said, I hate shaving. I do.  YOU?  I much prefer a good ole electric razor than the painstaking, sometimes 'ouching' razor, shaving creme, strokes, many. Besides, the older ya get, after you're done shaving, you wipe that crap off and it finds crevices.  Some left. A reminder of age, wrinkles, patooey.

I shave in the car, I do. Portable razor. People look at me strange, don't care, we're all strange.  So, ya pull up to the light, insteada hearing cranked up music, mebbe some F-bombs, mebbe someone checking out their phone insteada watching for the light to turn green, I'll be shaving.

 

Cats.

I thinka cats too. Cats, to me, are like political parties.  Either/or.  Dem/Pub.  Love/hate. Ya either love 'em, collect 'em as ya age, or, you hate, hate hate - there's that word again.

 

I actually love cats (TY ex wife for learnin' me about 'em, a lifetime of joy when I have had 'em.)  We are all aware, cats really don't give a rats what you think.  Kinda like us old people in that respect, I can relate. Cats, like people, also reach that Popeye point "I've had all I can takes and I can't takes no more."

Some people, when reaching that Popeye point, have road rage, use guns, fisticuffs, push, shove, cuss, spit.. yada...   Cats simply shred a curtain.  Wouldn't all our lives, this nation, this world, be better if, "When I find myself in times of trouble".. we'd shred a curtain?  Mebbe the facing of an ottoman?  

Victor.. you're getting off topic, you were talking whiskers.

Oh yeah, thanks.

I think we've all, mebbe, heard that them there cat 'muzzle whiskers' (the ones extending from their nose) are generally the width of their body, thus, allowing them use 'em as a measuring device to see whether they'll fit thru a space or not.

I wonder how many whiskers they have?  Thought you'd never ask.  Twelve (usually) on each sidea their nose.  Above their eyes, 3 to 6... they use these to protect their eyes when running thru tall grass, branches... they act as sensors to tell 'em, "hey, blink, quick."

"I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us, cats look down on us.  Pigs treat us as equals." Winston Churchill

Were you aware cats have whiskers on the inside of their wrists?  Ahm, Victor, somewhere up above you mentioned something about "old people not giving a rats", well, we don't give a rats.

Sorry, you're stuck.  If you'd rather, this time'a day, you can go watch CNN (calm down, or, FOX) to hear the back and forth between Joe/Don... Don/Joe.   Uh huh, kinda figured that reaction.

YES, 'whiskers' in the insidea their wrists, legs, whatever you wanna call 'em.  These 'wrist whiskers' (say that, 3 times, real fast) are actually used when they've got prey captured, and they help sense their tiniest movement.

If cats whiskers fall out, will they grow back?  Victor, hand me the remote, I don't give a rats.  Sorry, yes, they grow back.

Why are my cats whiskers so long?  Duh, you gotta fat cat.

Do hairless cats have whiskers?  Lemme see, I think CNN is channel 44.  Usually, no, if they do have 'em they're generally broken, shorter.

Is there sucha thing as whisker fatigue?  YES Victor, about the second sentence once you started talking cats.  Bite me, yes, there is sucha thing as whisker fatigue.  PETA, or some article I read, suggested you make sure to buy wide bowls to combat this fatigue.  (I may watch TV with you if this don't get better.)

Who is the craziest cat lady?  VICTOR!  MYSOGYNIST!  AM NOT!  ARE TOO!  It's always heard as 'crazy cat lady.' Little ole lady and her cats.

Lynea Lattanzio, that's who.  Now 67, she relates "I've taken in and lived with 28,000 cats. That's probably a record."  Uh huh, prolly.  Lynea operates "The Cat House On The Kings". Mind outta gutter, no happy endings here.  Well, I guess there would be for the cats.  At present, on her 12 acres, 800 cats, 300 kittens roam about.

"Including staffing, food, litter, maintenance and medical fees, the sanctuary runs up a bill of roughly $1.6 million a year." Holy guacamole, that's a lotta fur ball$.  “When I first started this endeavor I was out my own pocket for 7 years. I spent my retirement, I sold my car, I sold my wedding ring,” she explains, as if nothing would be worth keeping over the cats.

Just curious (it's me, Victor, again.) If you tried to see if cats really do have whiskers on their wrists.. did you get scratched?

"We have three cats.  It's like having children but there is no tuition involved."  Ronald Reagan

I gotta go shave.. you cats enjoy the day.

Love, Victurd

PS. Cat whiskers are actually called vibrissae hairs.  We humans have the same type of hair in our nostrils.  Do you shave your nostril hair?  Nevermind, it's cool.