Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and.......... Kale chips?

I'm a chocolate mess.  What's more, it don't really bug me too much.

I don't think there's many that were born around the time Tom Terrific entered the cartoon scene - that still, run.  Various reasons.  Knees. Hips.  Can't.  Mainly, don't wanna.

Baby affliction here.  I wouldn't "give anything" to be able to run, because I know, that if I could - I wouldn't. Ha.  Sure, I occasionally go to the gym, walk in the water, I can'ts stand on my feet on regular ole regular ground for very long at all before the "go sit down you idiot" urge hits.  I'm OK with that.

Occasionally, I'll go to the gym....... sit slovenly in the hot tub...  listening to fellow geezers in hopes of good blog scoop to retell........ then, go do the same in the sauna.  Then, go home.  Victor?  You mean no exercise at all when you go?  Uh huh, exactly. There are some days I don't even walk in the pool.  That's crazy, what's the point?  Borrowing from Mick...... "Hey hey you you get offa my cloud... hey hey you you get offa my cloud."

I find "yum" in this age.  A lifetime, we all spent, well... I guess the majority of us...  living, doing, because we should (and more than likely we didn't, I know I didn't)  "An apple a day, 30 minutes of cardio, 45 minutes every other day of weightlifting, arms one day, legs the next, keep the Doctor (and grey hair, wrinkles, bursitis, athritis, itchy itchy rashes) away."  Patooey.

Exceptions to the rule.  A gal that played basketball for me, she's only, I think 10 years younger.  Her luggage has tags from allover the US, marathons completed in boo koo states, including, the Boston.  Knee replacement. OH NO. I love her, she's a hard head, in a good way.  She posted videos, where, lil by lil, she worked her way back up to..... RUNNING!  WHAT? Uh huh. Did.

And then, two buddies, lifelong buddies... one, I ain't checked with him in a few years, BUT, for years and years and years daily, he ran up (and down) the steps at our high school.  Doesn't sound impressive?  Mebbe you had to be there... it's like ten times farther than "Yo Adrian" ran up them steps in Philly.

And yet another, 4 times a week..... goes around 20 or so machines, lifting this, squatting that, pushing thisaway, thataway, fitteen reps on each, and then does the same dadgum thing three more times around. He's slender. (Old) Chicks dig it.  I ain't got it in me.

Bravo. Kudos. Nomme.

Do you have ANY idea how many episodes of Mayberry RFD, Homestead Rescue, Treehouse Masters I'd miss if I did all that? ..  Not to mention the local newscasts with that one anchor lady I've been in love with since I turned 40-something.  I 'promise' Doc, I'll start......... next week......... year....... leap year......... decade.

IT. IS. THE. GOLDEN. YEARS.  Ya'hear?

We spent the first 20 years of our life learning "I WANT WHAT I WANT AND I WANT IT NOW" ain't exactly how it works.

Then........ we get married.  Uh huh, SURE, we wanna exercise, but oft times it's met with "the kids are still awake... we just did last Tuesday...  I'm (tired, not into it, mad - you snapped at me at dinner).. it's a weeknight"... etc, etc.  Victor, you're a pig.

Oink, hehe. The two female blog readers that come here just ran away, all good, they'll never then know, hear, be able to recount, that I wrote "We men would literally, be lost without you."

Then, we learn, if we WANT$ WHAT we WANT and WE WANT$ IT NOW, we gotta do the hup two three fours for 40+ hours a week, play in the yard, pool, living room floor with the kids... take the dog to the groomer.. mow mom's yard.. scoop the snow offa your own driveway as well as the older lady's that lives next door.  Hell to the no i ain't going to exercise. Ahm 'tared.

Where were we? Oh yeah, Kale chips.

"Well Victor... for your own health, longevity, we need to get you closer to your BMI."  And, Doc........ that is?  "Well, the healthy BMI range for you is 132.6 to 179.2."  That's a GOOD ONE Doc!  Now.... what is it really?

Scroll to GOLDEN YEARS.  Mebbe, after all them tariffs, its the Chinese Year of The Rat, as in .............. I don't give a Rat's...... well, you know.

I ain't seen 179.2 since before I had hair under my armpits.  I vote, we pick our own BMI, and, instead, call it BFR (be for real) or.. PPBH (pleasantly plump, but happy.)

I know I know, I'm gonna keel.   "A preachment, dear friends, you are about to receive On John Barleycorn, nicotine, and the temptations of Eve" - we all are.

I remember them cheerleaders a singin' "HEY HEY YOU CAN DO IT IF YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO IT."

Ya know, a stroke of pride, kinda sorta. Last year, I went to Mehico for a month. Months prior, I did change my diet.  Huh uh, no bread.. Sugar - what's that?  I got down to 200 pounds and, you're gonna ask "from what?" and I'm gonna answer "I'm sorry... what'd you say?"

Why do it again?  I didn't come home with no older Mamacita, I never even got kissed. That's a lotta Wonder Bread and Spice Drops I missed out on.

Ohhhh OK.  So I Googled "Healthy Snacks" (with a fine eye to crunchy ones, I like crunchy).. 

Greek yogartt.. kale chips... edamame (who?)..  pumpkin seeds (that's a maybe)..  rice cake sandwiches (nope, sorry, tariffs)...  hummus.. (who?)..  beets.... ahm, next please..   artichoke...

Googling "Mostly healthy snacks"......apple... banana.. blueberries... popcorn...  almonds.. cheese...

OK, mebbe.

So........ I go to the Piggly Wiggly........ no Mehico but I could stand to cut back......

Almonds.... yep....   

Chip aisle..  VICTOR DON'T DO IT..  Hey, it's where the cheese dip is!  Oh, and these lighly salted restaurant chips ain't that bad.....

Cookie aisle... VICTOR!  It's the Golden Years damnit!   I'll cutback and only get one package.

Darnit, they're outta chocolate pinwheel thingies... well.. I'll just grab this cheap vanilla sandwich thing, kajillion cookies for not very much...  oh... and this Pecan Shortbread thing.. I THOUGHT YOU SAID ONE?  Eh, whatever.  PEANUT BUTTER!  YAY!  I'm set for a week! ............. OK, three days.

Life is a full cycle kinda thing.

I WANT WHAT I WANT AND I WANT IT NOW.  Mom, dad learn us Huh uh.

I WANT WHAT I WANT AND I WANT IT NOW.  Marriage learns us it's a two way street.

I WANT WHAT THE JONE'S GOT AND I WANT IT NOW.   "Go directly to work (jail), do not pass the bar, golf course, gym (ha), to collect your $200,"

And finally, the Golden Years...  I WANT WHAT I WANT AND I WANT IT NOW.

You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille.

Love, Victurd