I is the 9th letter of the alphabet.....

Let me tellya 'bout the birds and the bees and the flowers and the trees 

And the moon up above, and a thing called love........

No, damnit, that ain't it.  I'm sorry... I get confused early morns.... It seems like Groundhog Day was just yesterday......  No.........hang on.  Or is it today?  Again.....

VICTOR?  Sit up in your chair..... take a swig off coffee...  shake your head left and right like a dog who just got outta the pond...... and TRY TO MAKE SOME SENSE.  I fear the Golden Acres Econoline Van will be coming to take you away, haha, they're coming to take you away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha to the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time, EXCEPT, they also take your car (Nope, scratch the Landing for two beers)...Your money.. (My money, honey?)..  Your cigs... (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!)

OK, I'm shakin' like Rin Tin Tin just got outta the tub again.

GOOD. Now, xplain Lucy...... "I is the 9th letter of the alphabet."

Oh, that.  That's for a teacher lady I went to college with that occasionally swings by here... and, a first cousin who retired as an English teacher for many a year (she's my go to)... but... BOTH OF 'EM say "You CANNOT start a sentence with "I is."  I just did.

I is the 9th letter of the alphabet.

Yeah, so?  And  your point is?

I is fat.  (AND, this, this is where, when I write THIS blog, it's my hope hope hope they 'come along'... and look at their own lifes lives, body, habits, that stuff.  They, being YOU, not the teachers.. well, they can too for that matter... 

I seen... sorry teachers... I saw.. I saw a picture of me from two years ago.  I love me some Mehican food.  SO.  I was going to Mehico.  For four, maybe five months prior, I said hell-to-the-no on carbs an sugar, so, that when i got there, i could eat whatever whenever.  I dipped under 200 lbs, and I ain't been that since... well, since onea them wives. But, once in Mehico, sure, another taco please and thank you.

You ever do anything like that?  Are you lucky and ya ain't gotta?  Are you like me (now) and, ya care but ya don't really care?

I won't go as far as saying I looked good, nope.  But (teacher, can you start a sentence with but?) I looked healthy. Now, I is fat.  And not healthy.

OK, let's talk exercise.  You?  Do yoi get up every morning, seven days a week and, after a cuppa coffee, march out the door and continue marching for 4 miles daily?  If so, I hate your guts. Not really, but kinda I guess.  Maybe it's more envy.

I've got a baby affliction and I simply can't do 4 miles any longer.  Victor, hogwash, even when you could, you didn't.  HEY! Who let you in!!

DO YOU EXERCISE REGULARLY?  Don't lie to me. I've known ONLY one person in my life who has exercised continuously since high school.    My BFF does.... or did, what with kids, grands, divorce, yada, we don't speak, see each other as often.... but, i know he usedta run up the steps at the old high school 5 times a day, daunting task, lemme tellya. (In addition to lifting weights, probably eating healthy, yada).

Do you like good music?  No, wait.  WHICH, do you think is more important?  DIET or EXERCISE?  Do they go together like a horse an carriage?  This I tell you brother, you can't have one without the other. No, WAIT.. hell, that was Al Bundy....... he's nuts (but I loved the show... especially when Marcie would flap her wings and say "WHY DOES HE ALWAYS CALL ME A CHICKEN?"

Chicken.  Ya eat a lotta that?  Are you a beef and tater only kinda person, and if so, you must have a good Edward D. Jones rep.  If you profess to fish, and, I know diet and exercise books rave about fish, i just can't do it.  And, perty please as I'm really old now, don't say "WHYINTHEHECK NOT VICTOR?  YOU SHOULD?  COULD?  HAVE YOU EVER TRIED IT?  Enter, upchuck here.  Sorry, not sorry.

90% of people who lose weight, gain it all back.  I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is fat (again.) I is keeping it off. HOW?  HOW'D HE/SHE DO DAT?

 So come on, is it sweat, or eat, or both. 

Do you care?  Do you, have you, dedicated however many years to doing one or the other or both?

I wonder what a health professional would say?  Victor?  Uh huh?  You have a friggin' degree in Physical Education.  Hang on Sloopy, Sloopy hang on.  Hang on Sloopy, Sloopy hang on.

Sloopy let his hair down in college.  I loved college soooooooooooo much, I did both my sophomore and junior years, twice.  I remember having EAGLE eyesight back in the day, good enough to see three desks over, otherwise, I never woulda made it outta Anatomy and Kinesiology class alive.  Now, my batting average in intramural softball (HIGHLY IMPORTANT TO ME) was over 300...  ahm, GPA, not so much, barely above 2.

My math skills were The Bomb.... "OK guys... the keg was $47.98, we each owe $7.99666 and we should prolly give Smitty a couple bucks for gas..............."

But. I ain't no health expert.

You?

Fess up.  More stringent upon your own kids diet than you are when the grands come over?  Uh huh, what I thought.  But, they could end up fat like me?

(SIDE NOTE....... Victor, this is kinda dragging on, hurry couldya?  I gotta take on the day.  OK. Band camp, when I taught Elementary PE... I had 40 minutes of my day where I sat in my office and twiddled thumbs.  Principal said "Thinka something to do with that time." Soooooooooo TBC

I started a class for fat kids. VICTOR!  I, we didn't call it that. And, by the looks of everyone that was in the class (it wasn't a 'have to' do if you were selected)... but... baby fat. Each. All. At first, kids made fun, as expected.  Then, they witnessed how much fun we had, in addition to  food charts, exercise suggestions, implimentations.... they were beggin to get in the class.  I think, nowadays, if you tried something like that - I'd be repremanded at the next school board meeting.  Worked back then.  And, we did have fun.  Called the class "Project Zero."  The goal NOT to lose.. that weighs heavy, no pun intended... but.. .to stay the same weight, and, develop good habits both in eating and exercising.

Where was I?  Victor, it looked like you had one eye on that last piece of pecan pie in the fridge. Oh yeah, that.

Punx said yesterday "6 more weeks."  I anticipate way longer than that on...  "Say, hand me the Fritos wouldya.. and... EXERCISE?  Hell no I won't go."

I is fat.

It is what it is.

Do you like good music?  Fritos?  Oysters Patooey.  Push ups?  Planks?  Crinkled or seasoned fries, or tots?  Wegovy?

I appreciate you reading....... truly.

Love, Victurd