Go to sleep... little creep....

When you have a little baby in your arms...  one who is only days, months old, can barely focus with the eyeballs and fer sure can't unnerstand language - it's certainly OK to change the words to Go To Sleep Little Baby.  I mean, how else can you lovingly say "thanks for" : the 3am wakeups, colic, poopy diapers, being on the receiving end of projectile vomiting. Touche' (little creep, go to sleep.)

Sleep is.. heavenly.. wunnerful... sometimes harder to find than Waldo.. confusing (ya wake up, wherethehellami, whatinthehell day is it?)..

You realize "it's just a dream" and that's either REAL GOOD or real unfortunate.  Ya ever wakeup mid yummy dream, and try to go back to snoozing to finish the dream?  Uh huh, me too.

Ideal amount of sleep..........

One would think it'd be the exact opposite.  Like, more and more and more sleep the older ya get, to eventually nighty-night altogether.

Oh to be a young turd again, faster'm a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap small building with a single bound.  

Kids can sleep anywheres...........

We geezers can durn near sleep anywhere as well.  We're practiced.  For example, I know a 71 year old that went to the Community Center just yesterday.. sat in the jacuzzi.. spent time in the sauna.. got out.. was set to walk (my, er, his exercise) in the pool... instead, he grabbed a chair, put his head back.. out, like a light.. some 45 minutes later, he awoken. It's for certain passing snotnoses giggled for he'd forgotten his partial and he was probably making strange noises, faces thru the gaps in those teeth as he snoozed.

Memories as a child....... Grandpa sleeping in his easy chair around 8pm..  years later, it was aunts, uncles..  s'more years later, it's us, snoozing behind them eyelids.  It is hoped our young ones have as fond of memories as we do.

Some junk I found about sleep:

Excellent sleepers tend to have more in savings. HA! (Remember, one goal of this blog is an occasional smile.  I don't think I'm funny, but that was.)

There has to be irony in World Sleep Day and, The Ides of March.  They are one in the same, March 15th.

According to the Sleep Foundation, male and female circadian rhythms are slightly different. These rhythms determine our sleep-wake cycles, as well as many other functions of our internal body clock.

On average, men have a longer circadian rhythm by approximately six minutes, meaning they often feel less tired in the evening. Women are more likely to have a shorter cycle, meaning they are generally prone to waking up earlier.   As well they should, right?  I mean, someone has to make coffee... set out clothes for the day... start breakfast.  MISOGYNIST!  AM NOT!  ARE TOO!  I jest, take a rest!

15% of people sleepwalk.  Ahm, Shirley?  Why are you opening the window? Actually had that happen once, onea them girlfriends (no names!).. scary, but, we were on first floor so that was good.

"It should take 10-15 minutes to fall asleep.  If it takes 5 or less, you are likely suffering from sleep deprivation."  Color me that, you?

"Our sense of smell decreases when we're asleep."  How do they know that?  I call BS.

"Women tend to sleep a few more minutes a night than men."  (I would gather that's due to 5, 10 minutes of consternation after hearing "not tonight honey.")

I wanna be a koala.  They sleep, on average, 20-22 hours per day.  Scootch over and hand me some eucalyptus leaves.

Presidential sleep:   I chopped down the cherry tree coined "Early to bed, early to rise." Give 'em hell Harry awoke early, had a shot of bourbon, a glass of orange juice, a brisk ten minute walk.. then.. bacon, eggs, cereal, toast and a large glass of milk. (Brings a tear to my eye being a proud Missourian!)  Calvin Coolidge slept 11 hours a day (includes his two-to-four hour afternoon nap)..   

25 to 40% of couples sleep in separate beds.

56% of people sleep with their pets.  "Good night (Ralph, Ida) seeya in the morning.. come on Fido, jump up!"

54% sleep on side, 37.5% on back, 7.3 on stomach.

According to NASA, the perfect nap is 26 minutes.  Be for real.

It's impossible to sneeze while sleeping. (or so says that "your sense of smell decreases" guy)

You can only dream about faces you've already seen.  (Must be same research dude.)

A snail can sleep for three years.  "Honey, I'm gonna take a nap, can you watch the kiddos?"

The world record for longest period without sleep is 11 days.

When blog writers go on and on and on, blog readers tend to fall asleep.

Sorry.

Goodnight Chet, Goodnight David, Goodnight Mrs. Calabash, wherever you are. Say Goodnight Gracie.

Love, Victurd