How much wood coulda woodchuck chuck....

I was today old when I learned Punxatwaney is a woodchuck. Simpleton I am. I am not a hunter, but, if he sees his shadow today (Woodchuck Almanac predicting 6 more weeks of Winter) I vote, mole traps. Sorry, not really.  (Mole traps, REALLY, sorry, not really). I also don't think that would get me into the "shot a rabbit" Elvis friend club.

Band camp, backyard, raccoons were getting into trash, everything. Got a cage trap, played ReMax realtor to 2 or 3 of em, setting them up with (the OTHER side of the) Missouri Riverfront property.

Then, a week or so later:

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprung from the bed to see what was the matter,

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters, and threw up the sash

Nope, wasn't Santa... it was Bux, Pux's cousin. He was trapped, kinda...looked, sounded like a damn tornado, flipping over in circles, strong strong metal bent so easily like a matchstick.

Bux strong. Hella strong. Must notta wanted Riverfront property, he was GONE, as in OUTTA THERE (the trap).

I think "at least a damn cord" is the answer... to... the how much wood question.

Where was I?  Oh yeah, February 2nd.

The hell now am I gonna do with 11 more months of gym membership?

Seven days until the Super Bowl... that's the only smidget I'll say on that as I'm aware 49 States are now Anti-Andy/Patrick/Travis/Taylor.

Eleven days until pitchers and catchers report.  Victor? Is that all you talk about, sports?

NOOOOOOO! I talk about old farts, snotnoses, Piggly Wiggly, Wally, annoying 90mph crotchrockets, tailgaters, women haters (I AM NOT A MISOGYNIST), itchy itchy rashes, derrieres, forgetting my teeth, Paul Harvey, Henry Gibson, Tim Conway, Barney and his bullet, and Weeeeeee Dogggies, Jed Clampett.

I keep thinking if I keep on writing and writing, Spring will get here.

46 days but who's counting.

326 more shopping days until Christmas. Jeans... size 36x30..no, wait.. 38x30... hang on, 40x30... oh sh*t, nevermind, sweat pants with an elastic wasteband😃.

Wiki say the groundhog is an extremely intelligent animal, forming complex social networks and it's capable of understanding social behavior, thus, hosting their own social network, Puxbook. (Last part Viki, not Wiki.)

I know, I'm bored too.

So, I'll thumb twiddle. Wiki learn me, contra-rotating thumbs VERY difficult for folks. (Normal thumb twiddling, both, same direction.)  I know, I tried too, couldn't do it.

Last one, promise. Always a favorite... grab your favorite snotnose, have them rub their belly and pat their head at same time. Almost always fun. If the punks can do it easily, have em try the opposite, rub head, pat belly.

Have a yummy Groundhog day. If you do see your shadow, I hope it ain't as big as mine.

I lied ("last one, I promise").  The next total solar eclipse visible from the US will be on August 24, 2044. I'll be (in an urn) 91. Bronze Mahomes will graduate from Texas Tech and be eligible for the NFL draft.

And, by then, we'll be on our 9th Pux from now (life expectancy, 2 to 3 years).

This blog ain't good, sorry.  The little redheaded snotnose kid reminds the sun'll come out, tomorrow....

Right Pux?

Love, Victurd