Seventy years ago today, a female physician brought me into this world. Five years prior, the same female doc brought my sister into the world.
Of course, Birthdays are special. There's admitted guilt though, to being afforded more days on the planet than either my sister or my mother. Say it ain't so, unfortunately it is and it's just not right.
So, for this particular day, not raising funds for any, of course, worthwhile charitable organization - instead, I pick to brag on both my mother and my sister and I thank you for your eyeballs.
Velma Pearl Schultze, a St. Patty's baby in 1921. The middle sister of three. When she married my father, someone asked him, "Did you marry the smart one or the pretty one?" His reply, "She's both." And she was, a glamour gal who was also athletic, and smart as a whip.
Being married to my father, who spent countless days/nights on the road as a sales representative, she often found herself in the role of both mother and father. Don't misread, I had the best dad too - it's just that his occupation, as our primary provider, borrowed much of his time from us.
So... mom, cooked, cleaned, laundered AND, played catch, took us to school, ball games, boy/girl scouts, read to us, much... and much more.
At an early age, she was driving and came within virtual inches of knocking a 9 year old boy off of his bicycle. That very day she stopped driving. That decision complicated things sure, but, we were also fortunate in that when we went anywhere (bus, train, taxi, etc) it also meant we were afforded with mother's company. Antioch. Macy's downtown KC for Christmas shopping and window shopping. A's games. Train/bus to grandma and grandpa's... Special.
In later years, she opted to work outside the home at William Jewell College (hint, hint Victor, she works there, you can go to school there free) AND, she did go get her license again to do so. Hardheaded son graduated HS, thought "Nah, it'd be goofy to go to school where you'd see your mom on campus" (GEEZ LOUISE VICTOR) So, off to Maryville. A 1.7 GPA later, to Maple Woods, to dropping out there, to eventual William Jewell College with a brain that, amazingly, had ripened a tad in spite of collegiate failures thus far, and this son LOVED going and visiting his mother on campus.
And, living in a frat house with 40 other crazies, he could be as far from home as he wanted, but in three minutes, he could be seated back home for a good ole Spanish Rice meal in his old familiar dining room chair.
My mother had a massive stroke in her late 50's. Did nothing to hamper her expression of love for her children and husband. Our mother was the type that, when a child coughed, she would not take a breath until it was with absolute certainty the child did. Every phone ring was met with "How's my Victor?" or "How's my Vanda?" It was about us, never her. We were lucky. Her favorite quote was "The secret to success in life is how you respond to Plan B" and did she ever. We got to have her 9 more years after her stroke.
Vanda Kaye Schultze. Read bias into this all you want, but she was beautiful. In fact, as children, we'd travel to a relative's house and we were met with "My my, isn't Vanda getting so beautiful..." and, then looking across the room, realizing they'd left poor Victor out of the loop, they'd add "And isn't Victor.... growing." Hmmpph...
Her HS days, old fogies her age tried to befriend me so they could maybe one day car date her! She was smart, fun, funny, lived life to the fullest and excelled at each and every age. Not many of us do that.
She would be the lead in a play, learn her lines the very first week. Write weekly articles in the local paper updating the community as to what's going on at LHS, and in her spare time she was a lifeguard, and led the band parade with her baton.
She teased her brother ("Alfred E. Neuman" I believe she called him) unmercifully, but in good fun.. She had an astronomical rise in her profession of child care - starting as a classroom teacher, to being one (of five) in control of a multimillion-dollar national daycare provider.
The kids loved her. Her boss loved her. HER own kids loved her. We all loved her. She had the uncanny knack to do things for others and turn it all around making one think you'd done for her. She was, a giver. A giver of time, a giver or things. She learned well from her mother.
Harvey Seely once got a new phone number - and, it happened to be Vanda's old phone number. He used to tease and joke with me about how many dadgum calls he got for her day and night from guys who attempting to woo her.
Like virtually all of our families, cancer entered. I was fortunate to visit her the last 72 days of her life at St. Lukes Hospital. The very proudest moment in my life happened the day before she passed, and was among her last legible words. As my ex and I entered her room that day, she perked up and whispered proudly "Baby brother!" Yes, she teased me like crazy (and I loved it), but, she loved me (and all) like crazy, and of course it was mutual. Until the dark day the day after, she literally lit up every room she was in.
So this ain't a gofundme. It's a gofindme, missing both. I know I'm no different than you and that we've all experienced loss. I find that to be all the more reason to talk about, revisit the lives of, those we've lost that we loved.
They should be here. They ain't.
Again, pardon the bias, but two, really really good people. Each, unknowing of an early end, somehow packed so much into their days.
YOLO.
Go love, while you/we can.
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