Saturday, August 10, 2024

Duck Duck Goose... What's your life quacked up to be?

"Calm on the surface, but always paddling like the dickens underneath."  Michael Caine

I work at a golf course.  Victor, I went back and looked thru your blog.  You've told us that 1,243 times.

Ahm.  I work at a golf course.  We ain't really got ducks but we got geese.  Geese is plural of goose. Wiki say : The term "goose" may refer to such bird of either sex, but when paired with 'gander' refers specifically to a female one (the latter referring to a male.)

Putting, tends to be a bit  difficult when there is a gaggle (<-- that's a group of 'em)..  the ball don't roll very well over the little  Toostie Rolls they leave.  Seems they rarely poop on the grass.. they much prefer the greens.

When in flight, they are called a skein, or a wedge; when flying close together, they are called a plump.  Don't you MISOGYNIST me, I copied that directly from Wiki.

The ganders are the ones that honk incessantly. VICTOR!  HOW DO YOU KNOW?  Ahm, I am a certified lifetime people/goose watcher.  I also like to tease a tad.

I ain't running for office with PETA... in fact...in this election season, the only time I'm running is away from the TV..  away from Social Media.. and I always try to turn the subject to "How bout them Chiefs" when anhyone near me brings up politics.  Honk. Quack.

Geese, Wiki  doesn't say this, Victurd does/did - to me, appear to be a microcosm of life here for usn's.  They 'nest' once a year... it's been awhile, but that kinda sorta seem perty close to what I remember.  There are conflicting opines (conflicting, like, Trump/Harris, Pub/Dem, KU/MU, Tastes great/less filling) as to whether or not they mate for life.  Some (most) say "yes", some ain't so sure.  In this day and age of conspiracy, me thinks I've heard "What's good for the goose is good for the gander" or something like that.

Beauty.  There is MUCH beauty amongst geese, life, us.  Amazing to watch when they 'plump' (Scroll to flying togethter).. their wedge so perfect... perfectly in a V... probably for "Victurd" yeah?

They are protective expectant parents.  They always have their eggs within a hunnerd and fitty feet of water... and, a couple years back... we dang near had to turn our 18 hole golf course into a 17 hole golf course as, gander laid her eggs on the teebox of the 18th hole (uh huh, right by the pond) and, they tag teamed guarding it, you'd play hell trying to get near the tees.  Ever eat a pine tree - no, that ain't it.  Ever been chased by a goose?  Uh huh, hard run when you're laughing so hard, letalone try to hit a perfect Driver down the middle.  VICTOR, your course is a par 3 course, you don't need no stinking driver... what's #18, like 190 yds?  Bite me, it's 170, and bite me again, YES, I need a Driver.

Like us....... fridge is/can be empty, gas prices go up, falls, trips, afflictions happen - accompanied by trips to Doc, ER, hospital stays... neighbors, family - argue.  We wing hurtful junk from our beaks, geese do too. They do do too, a lot. Scroll to the difficulty in putting.

Go to Wally World any day of the week.  Twenty handicap parking places.  Folks that limp, ride scooters, needs some  help.  Our golf course.  There was a goose that maybe had been blindsided by a Titleist or Calaway ball - and, had an extremely painful looking limp.  Sad to watch.

On a very serious note, geese can lose  young as well. Our superintendent relates he pretty frequently finds eggs in the grass, broken, away from the nest - probable cuprits, foxes, coyotes, raccoons, snakes.  Sad. Very.

There is beauty, like us'n humans, when, goose walks aside gander.  It is sooooooooooooooo dadgum cute,  when those eggs do make it... and... I'm oft reminded of the family I grew up next door  too... when they (all 9 kiddos, plus mom, dad) marched to the car to go to church.  Same. Same with mom/dad (goose/gander) when they march across the fairway, either,  headed to the pond (swimming is just as dang cute) or, across to the ORI (the green, where they learn about depositing Tootsie Rolls.)

Swift. No, not Taylor.  Time.  Time is swift for geese - just like us other earthlings.  Some can live up to 30 years though.  As those 'geese' march off to  church (pond or ORI).. you gotta observe 'em fast... for.. .they grow... and grow.. and grow.. and perty soon it's impossible to discern mom, dad, from bebbe goose.

I do not know if the youngsters fly off forever or, they come back, "borrow 200 worm$", play Farmville from mom/dad's nest, that stuff. I have, though, seen 'em in groups of 3 and 4, so, I suspicion, sometimes they come back.

Oh Canada........ life, for geese, and, for us human kinds - can have similarities. Eat, sleep, mate, fly (well.. we fly off handle.. they too sometimes).. loss... love... health woes...

There are good times, there are bad times.  Some, make you honking mad..... other times, ya get goose bumps.

A little diddy, about Quack and QuiAnne..... two American (canadian) Geese, doing the best they can.

Forward by Daffy, Donald, Tweety, Woodstock, Huey, Dewey & Louie, John Cougar Mellencackling... and Scrooge McDuck.

Love, Victurd

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