Tuesday, October 8, 2024

Yesterday.......

All my troubles seemed so far away........

No, that ain't it.

Lemme start with today, then we'll backtrack.  I gotta crick in my neck.  If you remember correctly and you've been here before... you must lead a very boring life.

No, that ain't it...  Well, it is...... sorry, kinda.  Where was I?  Oh yeah, Liberty, MO.. crick in neck.  Words fascinate me.  Perhaps even more than people (sorry.. kinda) but mebbe not as much as hound dogs.

The hell is a CRICK I asked myself as I turned my whole dayum body just to see what time it was.  Google (remember? I'm C+, M+ average smarts) informs crick is named after a famous British scientist:
  • Francis H(arry) C(ompton) Crick (1916-2004) was an English scientist who helped determine the structure of DNA in 1953. Crick and James D. Watson used x-rays to analyze the patterns cast by DNA molecules and discovered that DNA is a double helix. They shared the 1962 Nobel Prize in physiology or medicine for this work.

There I was...... I was taken to a place...... that hall of the mountain kings....... Naked to the world.. in front of... every kind of girl.

Crap, sorry.. .that ain't it either. Thanks for your patience.  Lemme try again.  I have a crick in my neck.  Cricks kinda hurt.  They makeya stiff, immoble, and feel stupid. They makea turn your body, similar to how Homecoming Queen waves to doting spectators.. on a swivel.  THERE. There's today's word........swivel.

Perhaps my neck hurts because yesterday (THANK GOODNESS YOU FINALLY GOT THERE VICTOR)..  Yesterday...  there were two... two.... two mints in one....... Nope, wait.  There were two very important Kansas City-like Sporting Events on at the same time...  which, literally means mosta the US prolly Netfix and chilled, or, played Farmville (that still around?), Sukoku, Solitaire, or maybe the whole fam damily went out to a nice dinner somewheres.....

The Corner Bar. NO, not you Victor.  I digress. NO, not you Victor?  OK OK OK. I don't have two TV's...  I don't have the SPLIT SCREEN THINGY...  I loves me some Royals (vs. Yankees) and I've been a Chief's fan since long before I had peach fuzz.

Corner Bar.  12 TV's.  Perfect.  Did I mention I enjoy an occasional beer too?  Sorry.  Not really.  I'm 71. It's me it's me, it's Ernest T.

TENSE.  Early, the games were tense.   The Royals game started 37 minutes prior to the Chiefs on Monday Night Football.  Yankees, early 1-0 lead. Sips were taken, cigs were smoked between innings.

Then, kickoff.  I think that's what they still call it. (It more resembles a game of Red Rover Red Rover, send Saint's returner right over - the way they line up.)

We swiveled.  Fastball, low... 2 balls, no strikes.. The udder way...  2nd down, 9 to go, pass, incomplete. Swivel.  YOU IDIOT!  THAT WAS A STRIKE!  CAN'T YOU SEE THE BOX UMP?.  Swivel.  In one fell swivel, Kelce caught a pass, Taylor jumped up and down, Andy and Patrick were with Jake from State Farm.  Swivel.

My neck hurts.

Can't ya see, whoa...  can't ya see...... what that woman, Lord she been doin' to me?

Ooops, sorry.. another "nope that ain't it."  Can't you see, what that swivel has been doing to me.

I've watched sports for 70+ years but even I got a tad confused by all the swiveling, having to adjust, Baseball Ray/NFL.  Back, back, back, back, back....  Holding, #72.. he almost violated the pitch clock....  First down, but only by an inch or so.

At one point, as we looked left, then right, then back left..  I think there was a single, a completion, a nice (baseball) catch, an offsides... a double.. a sack.. yelling, hollering..  one of the younger OG's at the Corner finally hollers what a lot of us thought but were not brave enough to holler ourselves......."I CAN'T DO BOTH!"

Swivel. Swivel. Crick, crick.  Thanks, ya damn Brit!

THANKFULLY...... It ended well..  It tweren't.. "Start spreading the news... You always make it there, you make it anywhere... Come on, come through, New York, New York" Sorry Frank... Sorry Judge, Sota...  And it wasn't "Oh when the Saints go marchin' in, oh when the Saints go marching in.  WE WON BOTH!  Swivel on that Costas... Joe Buck!

We are Kansas City.  Small market. Chopped liver. (Do people actually enjoy liver?).  Middle of America.  They don't know "is it Missouri or Kansas?"  Don't they have dueling banjos there? Ain't the majority of 'em related?

I have a crick.  From swiveling. Frank'ly (New York, New York) Louie (Oh when the Saints), I don't mind the pain...  Now........

'I've had the time of my lifeNo, I never felt like this beforeYes, I swear, it's the truthAnd I owe it all to you'Cause I've had the time of my lifeAnd I owe it all to you

Thank you Garcia, Hampson, Salvy, Ragans, GooseEgg Erceg...  Patrick, JuJu, Xavier, Travis, Kareem, Chris, et al.

Now, I lay me down to sleep. No, that ain't it. Now, I wonder which will happen first...  Another solar eclipse - or, the Royal's in a playoff game whilst the Chiefies are on MNF at the same time?

I swiveled to peek at Google.  The next full, total, solar eclipse is set for August 23, 2044.

Ahm...... 

To everything, turn, turn, turn (swivel, crick)

No... that ain't it.

To everything, urn, urn, urn.

Paul Harvey (and Henry Gibson)...  Good day

Love, Victurd

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(Editor's note.. I went back, as always, and reread before I hit 'send'/publish...and it really makes no sense... sorry... kinda...