It's the first three letters I abhor......... DIEt.

Sugar, ah honey honey
You are my candy girl
And you've got me wanting you.
Honey, ah sugar sugar
You are my candy girl
And you got me wanting you

No, you're correct - this really hasn't been a lifetime fight for me..   So to those who've battled, struggled, perhaps simply have the genes of a larger family - apologies and it's not my intent to sound like a whiney butt, but(t), I probably do.

I just can't believe the lovliness of loving you,
(I just can't believe it's true)
I just can't believe the wonder of this feeling to
(I just can't believe it's true)

I know we just left January - and historically, January is when so many of us hop on board, go, sweat, and then months later cuss at our bank statements because they keep taking out money for the gym, again, again, and again, even though we stopped setting foot in it back in April.

Ah Sugar, ah honey honey
You are my candy girl,
and you got me wanting you
Oh Honey, ah sugar sugar
you are my candy girl
and you got me wanting you

I. LOVE. SUGAR.  I do. But, it's evil! Or, so I hear.

With 20, 30, 40, fitty, and sometimes even 60, our butts don't make an impression on the sofa or in the easy chair.  With, s'more aging, that changes.  A wiseacre grandkid, might stop, look, point, LAUGH and then say "LOOK GRANDPA!  I CAN SEE YOUR BUTT IMRESSION IN THE RECLINER!"  Funny haha.  Maybe I'll laugh right along with him when I try to get up from it later. 

When i kissed you girl I knew how sweet a kiss could be.  
(I know how sweet a kiss could be)
Like the summer sunshine pour you sweetness over me
(Pour your sweetness over me)

I've really only had one fairly serious attempt at dieting.  I read books and articles and WebMD, watched friends walkoutta the Nutrition joint in town. Seen others ten weeks after they started SlimFast.. and then again, ten weeks after they'd stopped.  Tweren't a pretty site but again, so much (I think anyways) is genetic.  At age 70-something, genes don't give a damn.  You eat. And eat.  It sticks toya.

Pour a little sugar on it honey
Pour a little sugar on it Baby
I'm gonna make your life so sweet, yeah yeah yeah
pour a little sugar on it yeah
pour a little sugar on it honey
pour a little sugar on it baby
I'm gonna make your life so sweet, yeah yeah yeah
pour a little sugar on it honey

My Uncle, with his very worst Dad joke.  Our families would walk into the restaurant, and it wasn't five minutes later he asked each and every waitress "Can i have a little sugar?"  Har har. Yes, funny the first time.  Creep each time after?

Ah sugar, ah honey honey
you are my candy girl
and you got me wanting you
Oh honey, sugar sugar..............
You are my candy girl

There is so, so, so much I love to eat, I shouldn't. I'd walk to Ridgeview Elementary School for one'a their cinnamon rolls. Or hell, Strouds too for one'a theirs.  You scream, I scream, we all scream for Ice Cream.  I'd promise not to kill (ha ha) for a Dairy Queen Peanut Buster Parfait. (Now, they cost for than a pounda ground beef, so, I'll settle for a little small tubba Great Value vanilla ice cream, a bottle'a Great Value Chocolate Syrup and jar'a Great Value peanuts.

It (DIEting) is a rather small leap'a faith. It's like when you're out on the golf course.  You swing, you miss. (Should count as a stroke even if you missed the ball.) So, you glance right, then left, then back each way again... whew, "nobody saw me cheating, nom, nom, nom, nom, and "Down goes Frazier".. no wait, that ain't it.   "Down goes and ENTIRE box of Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies."  And, the answer to your question "Really?" is uh huh, I have.

It;s goofy because it ain't about other people... but somehow "Just one" gets in the way, we go to the scale the next day, cuss... then glance in the mirror and see the culprit right after seeing we didn't lose a dadgum ounce, mebbe even gained a pound.  I hate scales, mebbe why I never liked fish.

Years ago at work we had a Wellness thingy in the breakroom.  BP, weight, cholesterol, blood sugar... and then I was at the last station, she said "We're gonna measure your waist"... I laughed, said "You don't need to do that, I've worn size 36 pants forever and ever."  "Yes, but, we measure around the belly button."  "Oh." (Damnit)

I WANT PIZZA, FRIES (Seasoned, curly, waffle, crispy, don't matter), PASTA, PASTA, S'MORE PASTA, COOKIE, CUPCAKES, BROWNIES, CAKE.........  ain't it anyone's Birthday soon?

Pepsie, Mountain Dew, Dr. Pepper, Sprite, Fanta, Thirsty, just Whistle, Grape NeHi, four fried chickens and a Coke.  Quoting Beetlejuice, Somebody help me.

Will Power.  Never met him.  I'll just get onea them newfangled shots, then continue working on my butt impression in the easy chair.  Victor, that's no kinda impression for your grandkids.. THEY'RE the ones that were makin; funna me!  The little.. (VICTOR!)

And above, of course in addition to the sugar, the carbs.  Reading all them diet books, websites, et al, I'm not smart.  Not great at comprehension.  Sugar and carbs I can remember, I did try once (for more than a month) and it did work. BUT(T). 

It's hard. WIMP.  Uh huh, am.  I hate mirrors, they look just like me.

OK, I'm off.  Four eggs, two yummy slices of Fricks ham (the bomb), and a handful of extra sharp sliced cheddar, all scrambled up. VICTOR?  (Put's hand over eyes, peeks outta one.) "Yes?"  Sees stern look. OK damnit, three eggs, one slicea ham, and a tablespoon of cheese. VICTOR?  Whatever Richard Simmons, one egg a halfa damn piecea Fricks and a teaspoon of cheese.

I hate, Interstates, Poltical argue, the Transfer Portal, Arrogance, a cat that doubles as a tattoo artist, any temp Southa fitty, Joel Olsteen (sorry, just me prolly), stupid blogs, sorry.. and.......

DIEt's. 

Editors Fats Domino, Fatty Arbuckle, Sugar Ray Leonard, Joe Carbonneau, Wegovy and Ozempic........

Love, Victurd