Que-sera, sera... what will be, will be.
Mebbe you are like me in that you get up way too dadgum early. I suppose it comes from going to bed way too dadgum early, dunno. Morning routine has me reading a buncha different stuff... and, next to Maynard G. Krebs hearing the word "work", responding nervously, I-can't-take it, scared as can be, immediately blurting "WORK!" in response. I am the biggest wimp to words there is. I historically emote. Life, words, are (or is it 'is') the yummiest bowl of Alpha-Bits ever. (BTW, if you caught, remembered Maynard, you're friggin OLD!)
I'm in pieces, bits and pieces. (Victor... you already did that 'bits' blog thing). Oh yeah, sorry. I mean, (words I HATE to see at the start of a sentence)... I mean, if you really value your words, if you DON'T start a sentence with 'I mean' are we sposeta wonder if what you're saying ain't true? I mean, REALLY!
Looking back, I read recaps from 4 or 5 writers from KC about the game, one from LA (Speakinowhich, did you know you are SOL if your phone dies in San Diego? There are no Chargers there.) more reading, Facebook stories, memories from long ago, a story about a beggar who went into a restaurant to beg, partially complain too because he had some felonies previously and no one would hire him... so, owner hired him to wash dishes, take trash out, yada...
Then, yesterday I was blessed to watch the game with much younger turds (said lovingly) who treat this old fart really good. Then, I remembered 'back in the day', favorite uncles, grandparents, and such, in a room fulla loving people, boob tube a going, then, looking across the room and said favorite uncle, grandparent, and such - once watching TV, were 'lights out' as in old, asleep at the easy chair, wheel.
Quoting Benny King, the Drifters, "And then it happened." There were probably 15 or so relatively young, life newbies who were laughing at me, as... I found myself 'lights out', fast asleep at the easy chair, wheel, mid exciting game. Damnit darnit. Backwards, a look backwards on, at, life.
I thought about all those writers I'd done read about... how they got their start, what were they like back in the day.. .then I thought about The Big Chief Tablet........don't it always start with the Big Chief Tablet? Victor Schultze was tough enough. I think I finally got it down by third grade!
WHY? Why did I haveta "Big Chief" SCHULTZE? Why couldn't I be an LPGA golfer with last names like Vu, Yin, Ko, Kim, Lee, Lin, Shin, Chun... But noooooooooooooooooooo, Schultze. Then I thought about Arnold, poor Arnold.
He wasn't born with no Big Chief Tablet. He was Austrian, native language German. Thus, Großes Häuptling-Tablet, NOT Big Chief. Even worse, he was dyslexic as a child. I thought Schultze was hard, and there's little Arnold writing his name reggenezrawhcs. So, mebbe his teacher said "Hier, Arnold, schau in diesen Spiegel und schreib deinen Namen." ("Here Arnold, look in this mirror and write your name.") And then, once he finally righted it, he came to America. Then I guess he went to practice spelling it in English, told people... "hold on a sec... I'll be back."
Backwards. Me thinks of Michael Jackson and his dance, Moonwalk, all the rage. Then Mork, his wearing clothes, aging backwards. All them new trucks, they backa boat into the water and ya ain't even gotta touch the wheel.
We look back. We do that.
Kid the other day, had a suite at Arrowhead right nexta the Taylor Swift/Mahomes suite, so, she took a selfie, which, is the granddaddy of all in turning the camera backward, and right there, behind her, was Swift with her Chief's red lips puckered up for a big ole kiss into the glass to the kid. Kid had her back to Taylor, but oh what a pic to one day relive (look backwards)..
Life is really, kinda a backwards look. People tell me all the time "You need to stop living in the past." Of course I run to them, beg, plead, say "OK, I'll stop, I PROMISE.".. No, that ain't it. It's really, I don't give a rats ass what people think, I'm 70." (Victor, you're 71 now. Oh yeah, sorry, forgot.)
Crossword puzzles, to me anyways, are a look backwards. Recall I guess they call it. Yesterday was "Thomas Edison's middle name." BOOM, in a heartbeat, four letters, OF COURSE, "Alva." With honest apologies to Paul Simon.. er.. I mean, Paul, I'm sorry, borrowing your words, "When I look back on all the crap I learned in high school".. I knew, remembered, "ALVA." Simpleton. I am that. I even remember how to spell onomatopoeia. I don't remember what it means, but I remember the spelling. Why couldn't I learn, remember stuff that woulda helped me to heap big 401K one day?
Backwards. When one hears that a person is 'backwards', it don't leave no good impression. From looking back (as I reckon 'tis the theme today) some of the happiest people I've ever seen, known on the planet were maybe considered 'backwards.'
I don't look at backwards as a bad thing. Life is a scrapbook. What better than to sit in that easy chair and recall the pages. Harken to when that 42" waist usedta be 32". First bike, first kiss, first love, first car, all the past hounds, kitties, first time ever to maneuver the #2 lead on the big ole spaces of the Big Chief, Victor Kendal Schultze. (Lydia Ko, Minjee Lee, Xiyu Lin, Lilia Vu... me and Arnold hate you... just kidding.)
Backwards shouldn't have sucha bad name. I likes palindrome better. You know, same ole same ole forwards and backwards.. .nun.. civic.. racecar.. madam (REMEMBER Marion, madam librarian).. level.. bib.. mom.. dad.. sis...
Backwards. Haven't you ever had children moments, tantrums, terrible two's, 'borrowing' money later in life, where ya wanted to put em back in? Hehe, yrros (that sorry, backwards). Bite me, I'm lefthanded. I fill crap out backwards, cause if I fill it out forwards, expecially in ink, my left hand smudges it like crazy. Start at the bottom, that works. Backwards.
Then there was the blonde UCLA cheerleader. (VICTOR! You discriminate against a person due to the color of her hair?) I mean, there was this blonde UCLA cheerleader, pre-game, did her make up, of course looking into the mirror, and she labeled her cheek ALCU. Looked good in the mirror.
"During the song, Poppins says, "You know, you can say it backwards, which is 'dociousaliexpilistic-fragilcalirupus', but that's going a bit too far, don't you think?" (To which Dick Van Dyke replies, "Indubitably.")
This was a dumb idea, sorry. Kinda. I'll get outta here. Exit, backwards, stage left.
So, a dyslexic guy walks into a bra......
drutciV evoL
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